Mar 24 2013



Posted at 5:30 PM under Uncategorized

I am 4.5weeks into my ATR conservitive heal and it is a challenge some days actually most days and I get real frustrated which is gutting and real but then I always remember a song called BLESSINGS by Laura Story……(file to big to add on so jump on itunes or tube and have a listen)

there is more to my story on how my ATR happened….I prayed to God big time on the way to my netball game I was broken and just couldnt carry on with the way life was going and was ready to run away I just didnt know how to stop!…I contemplated driving home and not playing that game but I didnt want to let the team down so I drove to netball wiped away the tears composed myself walked in completly shattered…warmed up played all 43 mins of the 45 min game and then POP went my achilles…..for the first few days I was angry at God how why did HE let this happen….4 weeks later I can see that He answered my prayer that morning in a way only God knew that I would be made to be at a complete stop long enough to not be able to run…and actually deal with what was in-front of me and yes it is hard and yes there are many tears, frustrations, realisations, asking for forgiveness in areas that needed to be bought to attention that I just could not run from anymore (because I physically couldnt run from) but they are also His Blessings….it may be hard to understand for some of you…..But Gods hand is upon all of this


Life before my ATR was fine to the outside world as we are very good at putting on masks…well I am a pro at that…it is a coping mechinism from my childhood and it is also one that I put on and use when I feel most vunerable… with an ATR you are VUNERABLE….I had to peel that mask off and I was very very reluctant and still am some days…but I had to to let people in to help me because I needed help…I needed help with day to day stuff like you know and with a family of 3 awesome kids and a hubby we needed help (we dont have family here to help) but I was reluctant to do that as I have been hurt in the past so I have learnt to do it on my own… I did very slowly I let people in….it has been hard and hurting at times as my closest two friends who I thought would be there for me weren’t and that really hurt so of course that mask want back on…but God place a chick called Sheila in our life with her husband Mike and they have been a huge Blessing to us and our family…but the biggest learning curve for me is taking my mask off with my husband….another story…

But today if you have the chance listen to Laura Story’s song Blessings…..have a great day everyone!

3 responses so far

3 Responses to “BLESSINGS”

  1. steph828on 24 Mar 2013 at 8:42 PM 1

    Oh my dear! Yes, I so get this. Have you ever thought that God gives us exactly what WE NEED to make us into what we need to be for His GLORY? If you struggle with patience, He’ll give you impatient situations. If you struggle with pride, He will humble you. I see this as a blessing as you do, but it is HARD. Asking for help, remember is a BLESSING to someone else! They want to bless you because it blesses them. This was hard for me to learn as well.

    May God allow you to sit and be still, taking in the love from all around you. You pay it forward.

  2. joauer77on 24 Mar 2013 at 8:50 PM 2

    Hey steph828

    Yes so agree with you that is is also a Blessing to others to be able to do things for us because for some that is their giftings that God has giving them with and that is how they serve….that is one of my gifts so I guess that is why i am struggling with it to be on the receiving end! Im usually the one who is out there ‘doing’ for others!

    And yes God does give us exactly what we need funny though cause He answered my prayer in HIS way not how I would have answered it lol and His timing is PERFECT and HE is in control!
    I think we get in our head sometime If I ask God this he will answer it this way and in reality we arent giving our situations we are in total surrender to him!….when we do He does answer us with His love and reassurance that He is there with us and for us!


  3. torngoalson 27 Apr 2013 at 4:16 PM 3

    Joauer, I read a more recent post you did and decided to go back to your beginning and started reading. It’s strange how sometimes you read something and realize that there is someone thousands of miles away who is going through the same thing you are going through and who is feeling the same things you are feeling….even though I am much older than you *64. I too am (was) a very active person….going to the gym 6 days a week and always the care taker and doer….it is so hard to all of a sudden be immobile and as you said so vulnerable. I lost my dad on March 1st and had my torn AT operated on March 28th and I’ve had some pretty low days with the double pain of grief and virtually being stopped in my tracks. I too put on many masks….so I understand what you are saying….and I too agree with you that God most definitely has his own time schedule and way of stopping us, teaching us, healing us…..I listened to Laura Story’s song and immediately started crying….and downloaded it….because what if His blessing come from rain drops, what if His healing comes from tears, what if trials of this life are His mercies in disguise? He does hear my desperate pleas and yours. I know there is a lesson here….and I thank God I happened across your post. I pray you will not only have a renewed and healed AT….but a new joy in your life.

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