Janet’s AchillesBlog

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LOL….I Walked….Without Crutches!!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — janet at 1:11 pm on Thursday, March 17, 2011

I have been walking around the office without crutches all day. I was even able to carry my own breakfast from microwave to my desk. This morning while getting ready for work, I actually STOOD in my barefeet…..feeling fairly brave I decided to walk, with crutches, I did it! It looked really sad….kind of like Frankenstein but I walked. Soooooooo….while in the kitchen getting my food ready for work……I got braver and walked, without crutches, around my kitchen!!!! I was able, for the first time in 7 weeks, to bend down and get something out of lower cupboard…. with both feet on the ground…..couldn’t believe the stretch in my calf but what an awesome moment!…I really needed this.

I had 4 really really bad days…..I turned into a girl and cried for all 4 of them. At first, I wasn’t sure what was so upsetting but I think up until this point I really hadn’t cried over losing Riley Dawg or cried over the AT situation and I think theĀ  trigger was watching someone at the gym doing what I had always done. I think it was also the realization that even though I am not a world class athlete or anything something that I love to do was taken away from me….yes it’s temporary…but I was having a moment. The other thing is that I learned I really, really love working out….the weights, the classes, pushing yourself beyond what you thought…all of it…even getting my butt kicked by a trainer…I have no words for how that feels so I think having to watch some of my hard work disappear in a matter of weeks it was really hard and it finally hit me.

I know this is a really long post…my apologies….LOL..I’m purging.

Tuesday morning…can’t believe I’m telling this….I got ready for work…looked in the mirror and saw the blob that ate New York…( I can hear guys across the world groaning because they have gone thru this with their significant others)…so I took everything I had on and started whipping it out of the bathroom…put on my bathrobe….told my husband that unless I can find something to wear that doesn’t make me look like a beast I’m not going anywhere…..the man deserves a special place in heaven…he did not say a word.

Thank goodness I have friends who love me….I told my trainer and boss/friend how I was feeling and they didn’t make light of it….they empathized, let me vent and then asked if I was ready to move on….LOL…then my boss heaped work on my desk and my trainer kicked my ass.

Anyway…..I’m back to being me….I’ve accepted what is….for the moment….and I am definitely up to the challenge of a comeback. LOL my son reminds me that I can be like Rocky and rise from the ashes and become a champion again….he thinks he’s funny. I wonder if he knows I have physio tomorrow.

Quote of the day:

a true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths, feels your fears but fortifies your faith, sees your anxieties but frees your spirit, recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities……William Arthur Ward

5 Comments »

86

Comment by liverpoollass

March 17, 2011 @ 3:31 pm

Reading your post reminded me how dark some days can be. I too went through some serious downs but good friends and a new day saw the end to them. Not being able to do stuff that defines you is harder to deal with than the actual ATR I think, but sometimes it’s good to help you find new things you can do, or things that you’d forgotten you enjoyed.

I also remember the first walking moment, such an emotional high whilst being terrifyingly scary. Things seem to move quite quickly for a while and then slow to a snails pace again. But day bu day everything improves. With your determination I can’t see your recovery being anything but positive in the long term. Just take it easy as your still at risk of re rupture so don’t go mad and as Norm ssys ‘mind your step’ Carry on healing LL

87

Comment by iski7b

March 17, 2011 @ 4:07 pm

LOVE those kitties! Great photo.
It is hard to see what you love to do get put on the sidelines, but…it’s a challenge that I’m sure you’re definitely up to!

88

Comment by GerryR

March 17, 2011 @ 4:17 pm

“I turned into a girl and cried….” LOL But, I thought . . . never mind. Does that mean I turned into a girl when I cried each time one of the dogs died last year?

89

Comment by janet

March 17, 2011 @ 4:37 pm

LOL…Gerry….no the girl part was the 4 day jag…and you get to retain your guy status….crying over pets and people is ok…unless of course you looked in a mirror and cried…and then threw your clothes around??????

90

Comment by janet

March 17, 2011 @ 7:48 pm

Thanks Iski7b & Liverpoollass….I will be very careful and I’m greatly encouraged. I just really think I needed to take the time to be sad and do what I needed to do and then move on.

Vivienne is the Tabby and Scarlet is the tortoise shell. Vivi is the one that has to sleep with me and constantly touch me. Since we lost Riley the cats misbehave a lot more….they playfight with each other constantly but Riley used to play referee and break it up if they got carried away.

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