Yesterday on the day of wk33 since the ATR I returned to the courts and played my first games of badminton since that fateful evening of 28th May 2012.

I have to say, the nerves nearly got he better of me, I definitely did not rush to get changed and pack my gym bag, thoughts awry in my mind of ‘what if’s’ for the first time in 3months I really wanted a cigarette (having given up for 9months the cravings stopped a 6) instead I just do the (now regular and usual) warm-up/stretching and make my way out the door, to the car.

So I turned up at the courts, again no rush to get in, heart’s racing a bit now and my hands are shaking slightly at the at the thoughts - having told the lads last week that I was making this comeback today turned out to be a smart move, I did not, no, I WOULD NOT turn around!! If only to avoid the ‘ribbing’ the lads would of given me for bottling it…..I push onwards.

I get to the doors of the courts, deep breath, composure, another deep breath, one more deep breath and I pull the doors open…definitely no turning back now.

I can feel the expression of my face, I know I am showing the fear, the lads on our court and the old boys on the court next to us all come over to welcome me back - what a great bunch of people they are, I find a smile to express my thanks in the warm welcome and set-up the nets “Maybe I’ll just warm-up tonight and then let them carry on and play?” was the overriding thoughts in my mind.

The nets are up, I grab my raquet bag and take ‘old faithful’ out the bag, suddenly the raquets gained 10lbs, it feels heavy “I must be mad to be here” I thought, still I take the lunge and onto the court I go.

Stationary I hit a few returns, doesn’t feel too bad - missed a few returns, timings off (a lot), gently I bounce a bit, I shot goes over my head, I miss it - another goes over my head, I take the step backwards…..yes I hit, then it goes short, instinctlively I am making that ‘exlosive’ movement to get there and return it once more….I am too slow the shuttle hits the ground… the lads laugh of course, such is there way and of course that makes me feel more at ease.

But what just happened was a major milestone - I’d made it to the courts, I’d got out onto the courts and I’d completed the very series of movements that created the ATR without incident!!!

I ended up “playing” 4 games in total that night - Heavier than before, certainly lacking in agility, confidence, speed and intelligence, it’s safe to say I played badly, but I played!!

So did it feel great to get back? I was too nervous throughout to say yes, it was certainly something I wanted to do and I intend to carry on now. Playing form is aweful, it’s very noticeable to me how much more work needs to be done to get that spring in the ankle once more, but badminton was a really good workout for those muscles to get back that memory.

So even more overweight than before, lacking in agility, confidence and intelligence (probably thinking more about myself than the game) I still want to play, I still want to win (although achieving a win was 50/50 at best before the ATR ) and I can now visualise the areas of physio I need to focus on…..it’s not something that’s going to happen overnight or by itself, but I will keep working on it and it will happen….personal target is 8weeks to get match fit

My Ortho said he’d get me back playing at 6 months, it was actually 7.5months, so a little late (my fault not his though), but we got there and I feel good (my back, legs and buns ache a lot) I feel really good, today is up there with the best days I have had since the accident.

Happy healing all, recovery is just a matter of time, patience and commitment - time to let the tendon heal, patience during those first 16 “danger of re-rupture” weeks and commitment to do all your physio within your own bodies limits.