I had a lot of difficulty getting in here tonight. I’m pretty sure it’s my fault, if fault is to be blamed. I’ve noticed a proclivity to forgetfulness.
A lack of confidence in you know, those small things, like ummm Memory. It’s really been upsetting. I expect that’s from the pain meds I’m taking. Hopefully this will not last too much longer but this kind of shit scares me. Couldn’t remember the name of one of my cats the other day. Couldn’t remember passwords that have never been a problem or me. Couldn’t… can’t… couldn’t… can’t!!! Wow, what gives. So, how’d the surgery go? You tell me! I’d like to say it went great but there is SO much more to how well a surgery goes. My surgeon was definitely up to speed. He’s good at what he does.
I’m not driving yet. I suppose I could but you know, I just don’t want to push it. Is that crazy of me? i don’t think so. I’d like to think I can do anything I set my mind to. Like I have no impediments despite the surgery. But here’s the “rub”. I’m not on my game. Things feel harder to do than ever before. What that all about? My surgery is was not a big deal. Maybe I’m under qualifying it. Just told my wife I feel like I wasted the night because I couldn’t get any of this writing in. Had trouble with the website. Did I say that already? Very frustrating with password problems. Ridiculous really. Oh but woe is me. This is not meant to be a poor me rant. It’s supposed to be pro through to date. Here’s the facts. It hurts. Shit, of course it does. What’s the deal. It’s been a week since surgery and it’s getting more painful every day. It’s not the most horrible thing I’ve ever felt. Not even close. It’s something I’m completely aware of and that part that hurts should be hurting, dammit. What a surprise: The back of my ankle hurts. Of course it does. There’s an incision back there. He cut into my tendon there. He found all that scar tissue back there and in there between strands of tendon. From what he tells me, he did a pretty thorough job back there. So, it’s gonna hurt. And it does. So I haven’t picked up driving yet. It’s my left leg, my non driving leg, Shouldn’t be any problem. I just really don’t feel like taking that little task on.
So the purpose of this little post is to come clean about a couple of things. Rough draft, I suppose, is as far as this will go but I’m burning and I suppose when you burn, you’ve got to put the fire out. So… #1… here it is… (well?).. (what’s holding me back?)… Oh, and did I tell you that my heel hurts like crazy? What’s that all about? Maybe it’s some kind of referred pain. But it hurts like a son of a bitch.
OK, OK, here goes. lots and lots of heartburn. Chewing on a lot of Tums. I really don’t understand that and I hate heartburn. I take medication for heartburn. Have had it since I was 19. I’m 60 now. So, a long time. So when it shows up like this, i get concerned. And by the way, heartburn really hurts! Damn.
I’m limping more than I had. Guess I won’t be putting on my running shoes real soon. So, as you can see, there isn’t much blogging about. except for the catharsis it promises me. I’m glad about that