Tomorrow is 5 weeks…
Today I got my last cast and was told to begin PWB. I should go into a boot next week and have a PT appt the following week. Milestones, right? I should be happy and a movin and a groovin… But it has been a heavy day. The past week had felt like progress. Less swelling & need to have cast elevated constantly. I also had become much more comfortable on my crutches. Things finally had started to feel normal and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
The nurses all remarked that I seemed so much better today at my appt. (This might have something to do with the fact that I was not crying, hissing or growling this time round). However, something changed when my foot was released from the cast and I was able to give it a good scrub and a rub. It felt so weird. So foreign. So….. Icky. I was scared.
now I am back at home. As I step gingerly on my tingly yet numb foot it feels so wrong. Not painful, just wrong. I am back in my weepy dark mindset and it is strong enough that I am going to let myself wallow in it tonight. Tomorrow I will take a deep sigh & will hop back on the mean old Achilles ‘horse’ and will keep moving forward but right now it just feel like this is never going to end….
on July 9th, 2013 at 8:20 pm
Going to a new phase is frustrations. Just when you think, I got this, you go to square one of a new phase. But… you did get the hang of the crutches, the NWB, and all the other phases, so… I have no doubt you will get the hang of this phase as well. It may be a long journey, but it is shorter than when you began.
on July 9th, 2013 at 9:23 pm
Oh I can so relate!! And I have cried so much in the last 6 weeks and 5 days!!
I would bet that they angle of your new cast is less than that of the old. Every “new” thing has put me back. I was told at week 3 to take a wedge out AND start PWB. So that day I took out a wedge - ouch and started doing laps in the house with PWB. That night I was in so much pain that I took a valium to sleep (and stop crying??) The stretch alone is enough for one day. You will see a very common theme on this road to recovery is two steps forward generally means one step back!
Good luck!
on July 10th, 2013 at 3:05 am
This injury is wrought with challenges. It seems every time we get used to one thing, something else happens to make us have to re-adjust. You are not alone! I felt the same way when the cast was removed–it was icky and scary. It does get better though–I no longer feel like a stiff breeze will blow my foot off. Hope that you are back on the Achilles horse
on July 10th, 2013 at 8:56 am
At the appointment where I went from a boot to 2 shoes I also had little cry, I was scared and also relieved that The Big Day had finally come. I had to be coaxed to walk and yes it did feel so weird, but within a day I was a little more confident, and more the next and so on.
Now at 16 weeks I remain frustrated, maddened that a 2 mile walk still leaves me suffering the next day, but also busy and enjoying each improvement, I know now from experience that in another month that walk will be fine, and its the 4 mile walk or who knows, maybe the 6 mile walk :-)) that will make the leg angry. Keep at it, we’ll all get there eventually, perhaps we could be an Olympic 4 x 4 relay team…
on July 10th, 2013 at 12:19 pm
Oh goodness! Thank you all for sharing and for the encouragement. I am feeling much more ‘ready’ to move forward today. Today I also found out that I was approved for short term disability which has taken a huge load off of my mind as I had virtually no savings and I will not be able to return to work for a number of weeks. Foot feels better today but I am going to go easy on it as the stretch of last week’s cast change took 2 days to catch up with me. I’ll probably watch my 10,000 th episode of Criminal Minds, catch up on paperwork and work on some long unattended chores that I am have learning to modify over the past couple of weeks…
on July 10th, 2013 at 12:58 pm
Glad to hear you’re feeling more optimistic! As said by the others, this is a challenging injury. I ‘too’ am facing a few challenges weaning into ‘two’ shoes so can certainly relate to the frustration of the slow progress. I’m so terrified of re- rupturing, I walk around as though an invalid. That being said, I am remembering what others have said and am ‘going slowly’ and am being careful. Thankfully I put my boot on when I went outside to inspect our trailer. Good thing too as I stepped down onto uneven ground and got quite a jolt. Had I not been wearing the boot, I know it would have been a re-rupture. As it was, I did have soreness and the fear began to creep in… So, celebrate the successes but keep treading CAREFULLY!